Baltimore, MD - Oct. 18, 2025 - As I sat down on Motzaei Yom Tov of Simchas Torah, I saw the email informing me of the sudden petirah of Rav Moshe Hauer, ZT”L. At first, I wasn’t sure if I was reading correctly. I glanced at it a second time and was trying to process it. For the next fifteen minutes, I sat on my bed in shock.
Five days later, I’m still shocked and grieving like everyone else, but trying to function, be productive, and somehow emulate Rabbi Hauer’s ways. I am not a congregant, peer, or even a talmid, but my connection to Rabbi Hauer goes back about fifteen years.
My wife and I have a son, Eli, who has special needs, and Rabbi Hauer was invited to speak to a group of parents with children with special needs. I was so impressed with his words of powerful and soft-spoken chizuk.
As time went by and our son grew up, I felt that some parents, like ourselves, could use some chizuk. As a result, we started a support group with various inspiring speakers. Most of our speakers were talented and articulate professionals or rabbanim who had children of their own with special needs.
After hearing Rabbi Hauer speak, I felt he would be a great fit to speak to our parents. When I called Rabbi Hauer, in his humble but confident demeanor, he expressed that he might not be the best fit for the presentation. However, after describing our parents and the goal of the lecture, he agreed to the task.
I remember the inspiring evening and was so taken by how he was so on target. The approach he took was so caring and sensitive to the feelings of our parents. I could tell he did a masterful job on his homework and measured every word so carefully. It was a special evening that everyone walked away inspired and uplifted.
About ten years ago, as our son Eli was turning sixteen, it was getting more challenging at home. He is autistic, non-verbal, and developmentally delayed. There is no question that he is a neshomah tehorah and is not required in mitzvos.
My wife approached me and felt that as Yom Tov was coming around the corner, it would be best for him and our simchas Yom Tov that he go to school on those days. I told my wife that I agreed, but I would like to ask a shayla before we put Eli on the bus to school.
That night, I called Rabbi Hauer and presented the shayla with all its details. Rabbi Hauer thought for ten seconds and, in his soft-spoken, humble, and confident way, responded. He told me, “Not only do I agree with your wife that sending him to school would be better for him and your simchas Yom Tov, but you should go a step further. Please tell his teachers and staff that whatever they have the class do in school, he should be doing the same. It doesn’t matter if it’s cutting, writing, or pressing a button on a computer. I am telling you this because if he senses that in your home it is Yom Tov and at school they are holding him back from his normal routines, it will throw him off and they might have to react to his behaviors in a firm way. I am afraid he will come home with feelings and emotions that will make you regret your decision to send him to school.”
To be honest with you, I wasn’t surprised with the answer, knowing Rabbi Hauer, but I was amazed by his sensitivity, caring, and brilliance. Who thinks like that on the spot? He was a person with a mission and goal — and that was only growth in avodas Hashem. He cared for and loved his family, shul, community, and Klal Yisroel.
It didn’t matter where you were from, your background, or your opinions — it was all l’sheim Shamayim. Let us try to emulate his ways, and it will be a zechus for his special neshomah.
